Friday, January 30, 2015

Unqualified Advice #3



If you’re the best there is at your job but you’re being forced to interview for the job you already do, do you shave your beard and cut your hair, or do you say “Screw it. I’m the best. They can take me or leave me regardless of my hippie hair and Grizzly Adams beard,”? –Dani

Have you looked at me? I should get “Screw it. I’m the best.” tattooed on my chest As I kind of look like a better version of Juice Newton.  I am a big fan of rewarding what works and what doesn’t. Let your actions speak for you.  My advice, let your freak flag fly, and save the new look for a new employer. Unless you love what you are doing, then CONFORM! everyone is doing it.



Two questions: Will the Vikings ever win a Super Bowl? What's worse. Being a Vikings fan or an ISU football fan? –Thad
Ever, like ever ever? Or my life time ever?  Doesn’t matter since they are my team the answer is “no”. But I will still go to games, and I will still buy the jerseys. Which feeds nicely into my next answer… The Vikings seem to just break my heart, where as the clones surprise me once in a while. You have to go to bars before Vikings Games, there is glorious tailgating and ours is a stone’s throw from the front gate at Jack Trice. Weighing everything carefully, being a fan of the Cubs is the worst. Now that I say that, maybe being a fan of the school that gets beat by the terrible in state rival is worse....but what do I know?  My advice is to cheer for a front runner like Alabama in football.

If a tiger eats a vegetarian then throws up, does it still have to count it a daily caloric intake for Wright Watchers?  -Eric
Yes, and then no.  Bu the really good news is that at no point will the tiger need to claim any carbs or gluten.  My Advice, the tiger should eat more and smaller meals, this will help to cut down on the regurgitation.


 Have you watched the Nightly Show? If yes, what do you think? –Dani

Yes.  If I say "not a fan" does that make me a racist?  Because I am not  a fan, the lines are poorly delivered. The jokes are already stale. And the premise is better on Maher’s show. My advice, Watch the daily show and then go to be 30 minutes earlier than normal, your body and mind will thank me.


Where has been your favorite place to travel/vacation to? – Matt

Let's Go. Right now!
Our favorite place to visit, GREAT staff and some of the best resort food we have had
Very similar to the Valentin, only this one was just named to a top 10 list and has made it VERY expensive, Secrets Silversands is a more affordable option in the same family or resorts.
 What is not to love?!?! you could live there your whole life and not see everything.
 Great ski community that we would love to visit in the summer to see what different seasons look like.
quick get aways:
Football, Baseball, Basketball, food, malls, art....
 Food, art, zoo, shopping
Football, Baseball, food, malls, art....
Chicago
Football, Baseball, Basketball, food, malls, art....
On the list to try still:
 it looks cool
I like wine



How evil is PopMarket? And how glad am I that I didn't know it existed in college (because then I would be super-poor). – Mike
First, my advice get a second job. I need to now.  And how evil? This evil(help me):
Genesis - Nursery Cryme and Foxtrot and Selling England By the Pound

Joni Mitchell - Blue and Ladies of the Canyon

Led Zeppelin - Led Zeppelin IV and Houses of the Holy

Megadeth - Countdown to Extinction

Megadeth -Youthanasia

Megadeth - So Far, So Good... So What!

Megadeth - Rust In Peace

Megadeth - Peace Sells...but Who's Buying?



Thursday, January 29, 2015

Hipster, Total Hipster pt. 4

The vinyl me, please web site has a listing of their 52 "must haves" and as I read through the list is it a pretty great one.  So I am on a quest to track them down.  New or original doesn't matter to me so much, but what I am finding is some aren't so easy (or cheap) to actually procure. but this is what I do, check amazon, eBay, the interwebs... I need to find a couple of good vinyl spots down here in Dallas, that is next on my list to do.  I do know the next time I am in Minneapolis my buddy Justin has offered to take me to the best record haunts up there, so that is exciting!  On a side note, if anyone happens to run into a copy of Beck's – Sea Change and it isn't hundreds of dollars and is in good shape, pick it up and I will buy it from you!

My latest purchase is Beirut - The Flying Club Cup It was not available on Amazon Prime, sold out, temporarily unavailable), there are a couple other options listed at $300.00 + shipping.  So I found this one on eBay from the pacific northwest.  I haven't opened it yet.  But I do love love love the sound, and I am a pretty disagreeable guy, but this makes me happy, oh so happy.

 The words, as taken from the album back:

Cliquot! Your name still haunts our conversations, we haven’t forgotten you our friend and constant companion, hunter of the elusive Spanish fox (his tail curls counter clockwise), holy fool, pickpocket, born in the blue shade of a Lebanese cedar, his mother wrapped his moist head in Turkish silks like a whirling dervish and christened him Cliquot, bastard son of Jean Luc, a retired legionnaire with black teeth. Cliquot! I have seen you beat a man in the dark alleys of Pigalle and then come weeping into my room to sink your soft blonde head into the depths of my lap, moaning “I have no home, no country, no mother”, and so I held your bruised fist in my palm and counted every crooked line and wrinkle and told you the story of Napoleon and how he fell to sleep every night by intoning (in his hoarse battle-weary voice) the name of every country he had yet to conquer.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
On cold nights Cliquot would wanter the Marais in a purple bishop’s robe and mandarin slippers with tiny bells ringing around both ankles. Little Napoleon, in Pere Lachaise, you told me how they once buried men with bells they might ring in case they woke because death is never real it is
The balloon is ready, I’ve tethered it to the balcony with a knot no sailor could invent. Ignore the gathering crowds below. Plebeians! Maybe if we look closely we will find our mothers waving handkerchiefs, and our fathers scowling. If we see any children we’ll throw them candy but don’t tell them why we are up here, floating above Belleville in a hot air balloon. If they knew, they’d never want to sleep in their own beds ever again.

Remember how we met? Barefoot on the beach (the hem of your dress starched white with salt). I was flying a beautiful kite. Yours was ragged and obviously self made. After a few failed attempts at flight you threw your kite on the sand and stomped on it. I wondered if it was your first kite. Kite making, you assured me, was not your specialty. But we are too old for kites. Let us toast the Flying Club Cup, our health, a quick painless death and helium.

I’m going to sleep so well tonight.

Breathe in, deeply now, okay do you feel it?
Don’t worry, we’re finally here.

Congratulations to Mike, Cathy and Dani for entering to win!, I will be contacting you in the not too distant future with details.

There is still time to ask questions in the post below as well!
Song of the day? enjoy the full album:

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Question time #3

Wednesday, and that doesn't mean hump day, that means it is question day.  That's right, enter your question in the comment section below for Unqualified Advice answers this Friday.  I know what you are thinking... what is he unqualified to give answers on?  You have a question on rocket building, I have advice for you.  You have questions on distribution practices, I have unqualified advice for you.  You have questions on how to raise your children, having none myself allows me a unique and correct way to give unqualified advice.  Don't even get me started on the subjects of power-lifting or interpretative dance, I am super unqualified to help you with my advice on that. You will probably find the advice life affirming if not life changing.

music for the day:
"Dazed and Confused" Led Zeppelin



hurry before time runs out.... 11PM tonight.....1-28....it ends.....

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

GIVEAWAY!

In an effort to spread some cheer and some shameless self promotion  I am having a giveaway from Texas.

So, in the spirit of woot.com and their random bags of crap they give away I am having a giveaway, but I am not promoting it on any other social media sites, so if you have stumbled on to this congratulations(maybe).

 RULES:

  1. if not already. you will become a follower of this blog. This may not be possible via the mobile side, so you may need to either get on a computer or browse with "view web version" at the bottom
  2. you will leave a comment in the comment section with your name the number of comment you placed.  First comment will have a 1, second will have a 2 , third comment will leave a 3 and so on up to 10 PS if any of you assholes put "your name" and not your God given on you birth certificate name, you will be disqualified! It can just be your first or last so I can match it to the third rule below
  3. you will then email me at CamChristensen@gmail.com with the subject "GIVEAWAY" and you name in the body of the email (this is how I will contact you for your address)PS if any of you assholes put "your name" and not your God given on you birth certificate name, you will be disqualified!
  4. first ten (10) people to do this will be the "winners" 
  5. this giveaway ends Wednesday night January 28, 2015 at 11PM central time
  6. only one winner per household
  7. you will send either photos or a youtube video back to me of you opening your "prizes"
  8. you, and not just your likeness, will then be the subject of a post in the future


CAMERON'S GIVEAWAY COMMANDMENTS v1.0


I. You will expect nothing beyond ONE package with really bad items.

II. You will not bitch or moan when some people’s stuff ends up better than yours.

III. You should take a minute as see if it might be better off just not asking for this.

IV. You will not bitch or moan if for some reason 10 people beat you to the comment section (this is doubtful, very doubtful to happen).

V. You will not bitch or moan if it takes a long time for your "prizes" you won to show up at your house.

Monday, January 26, 2015

Things I Like

Things I like, this time will cover nice knives...They are one of those splurge items that until you have cut with a nice blade you do not know what you are missing.  Jamie's Aunt and Uncle, Cathy and Wayne,  many years ago got us a Wüsthof starter knife set with everything you could ever want. Since them we have added several more items into the every growing knife block.  Which leads me to
the point of this post and sharpening...we have always had the classic stick style honing steel, and while it did a fair job (all honesty could be user error) the blades were never all that great after a couple of uses.  This year for Christmas, from Jamie's sister(my sister-in-law) and her sister's husband(out brother-in-law) , Kerry and Tom (for those that don't know them), I received the Wüsthof handheld four stage sharpener.  2 stages for steel blade and 2 for Japanese blades.  Now all it take is two pulls through the course slot, and 2 through the fine and the knife is as good-as-new sharp.  It has made using them a real joy again.  Thanks to all of you!  So if you think your knives just aren't as good as they used to be, a better system for sharpening may be all that you are lacking.

Thinking of something fun for tomorrow, so you will have to check beck and see.

Today's some of the day:
"Opportunities" The Pet Shop Boys

Friday, January 23, 2015

Unqualified Advice #2



As a fellow work-from-home "tech" worker, I'd like to hear your experiences and career story. It seems like more and more companies may start following the trend and people might be interested in hearing about it. I can chime in as well. –Kelly
While not really a question, I do have advice/input on this topic.  I was born a poor bl….. wait that was a movie I was watching last night.  I am a double major in Mathematics and Computer Science.  I was hired at CDS Global in the summer of ‘98.  It was a brilliant time to be in IT as everyone that was in the know, knew that come Y2K every machine was going to come alive and kill all humans, in a few years we will wee that January 1, 2000 SkyNet was born. But I digress, with my Simpson College education I was hired to work on our marketing database which I have continued to do in some form or fashion over the last 16 years.  

Enough on me, now about working from home.  First I do not think it is for everyone.  If you are the lazy bastard that naps in the office, you will literally just go and sleep in your bed.  The office napper should be excluded.  The penny pincher that will not get large bandwidth high speed internet because they are fine with their DSL as "it works" should be excluded from working from home, they will spend most of their day waiting for files to be pushed around the tubes of the interwebicon. The last auto-exclusion group of people are those that won't have a dedicated office.  No home office, get your ass into the real office.

Pros:
  • it is quiet here 
  • with IM and Phone and Email and video streaming it is easy to be connected
  • it is harder to get pulled into other people's problems to fix, which in turn makes it easier to stay on task
  • I actually get to use my "unlimited" minutes on my Sprint plan for all my calls I am on
  • I get better/healthier food for breakfast and lunch than the work cafe made
  • the toilet paper is superior at my house to the 80 grit work offered
  • it is really easy to check on late jobs and make sure everything is running smooth
Cons:
  • if I do not go out to dinner I can be a shut in for days and days at a time
  • it is harder to get pulled into other people's problems to fix
  • I actually get to use my "unlimited" minutes on my Sprint plan
  • I get better/healthier food for breakfast and lunch than the work cafe made
  • the toilet paper is superior at my house to the 80 grit work offered
  • it is too easy to check on late jobs and make sure everything is running smooth
I do think that is it really important that at least quarterly that you do make it into the office and have face to face time with your teammates, and the people you support.  Just to let them know that you are around, and to make sure that all obligations are being met. In summary, I like it much better than I thought I would, but working from home will not be for everyone.

Your thoughts? 

Which bread wrapper provides the best protection from wet weather for shoes? –Ted
Originally being from Iowa, this makes me an expert in bread wrapper shoes so this question is right in my wheel house.  First you don’t want any of those French baguette bags, as they are very narrow and made of paper (unless you have been binding your feet to a size 1, then this may be an option for you). Second you don’t want to use a generic bread bag like a white bag that simply says BREAD, they put holes in their bags to let the GMO chemicals and gluten monsters out to roam the Earth. Third the point is, the plastic isn’t to keep your shoes dry, but it is to keep your feet dry so I suggest you put on a pair f socks, then a gallon size zip-lock freezer bag, then another pair of socks, then your one pair of hole filled-pig slopping-nut chopping-chicken feeding-church going-school shoes.  The water you walk though will clean off the filth from your one pair of shoes, your feet will stay dry, and people will like you more as you won't smell like pig shit.

Where is this country headed? –Ted

Ah, my first trick question. This country being the center of the universe is going nowhere!  Once you get past where the water falls off the edge of the maps, it is just past where is says “There be Monsters here” you will see that the planets and Sun and Stars actually orbit around us and we don't move.

Can wealthy people succeed from the Union and buy their own country? –Ted

It is a little known secret, but we already have and it is called Texas.

My underwater basket weaving class has increased its price. They say it is for the emergency medical technicians they have to have on site and the costs of cutting such large holes in the ice. I have suggested that just three holes would be sufficient one to have your head submerged and two for your arms. This, i believe, would greatly decrease the immediate onset of hypothermia. However they say that to get credit for the class you must have complete submersion. So my question is how much should I spend on repairing a vehicle that I plan to replace in a month. And what Color of truck should I get?  -Jeremy PS They don't offer my favorite color on vehicles. Like clear would be hard to do. Duh.
First let me solve you ice problem. In the fall, float a door in the water.  Then when the water freezes you simply turn the knob and you have a doorway to your underwater basket weaving class. Say “Hi” to Ronnie Harmon for me.  Now, on to the real question you asked.  Only spend as much as it takes to get it running and drivable, unless you don’t need it or don’t need to sell it, then don’t drop another penny into it.  If it is going to a private sale they will beat you down anyways, if you are selling to a dealer, they will just screw you on the price of the new one. As for the color, clear would get you in trouble when it is “no pants Monday” so I would suggest going with a nice white truck.  Then you can dress it up with stickers. Hello Kitty stickers.

Han Solo or Spock? –Guts
Hmmm Spock is in a Beastie Boys song (3:20 for that line)



But Han is the best at love



I will go with Chewy, since I am hairy like him.

How come no one ever wants to play Trivial Pursuit but they love Trivia Crack? –Mike
Ah, this is a great question.  First it is for the social aspect of Trivia Crack.  I mean how else can you get together with your friends and play a game is not for over your phone in the quiet of your own room watching pr0n on your computer? Second, people like to cheat.  It is hard to cheat when you are sitting at a dining room table with all eyes on you asking a question on 80’s pop television. But it is easy in your bedroom to pause one’s pr0n and hit up the google and type in the question to easily get the answer.  See now they are smart.  Third they were tired of the social game words with friends, as everyone downloaded the bot that played the biggest word for them.  So there you have it, people as social cheaters that love to win when they play games.

So when is the right time to start looking for a job and does a resume really matter that much? - JB
Please see the flow chart I made for you below:
Cam's when is it the right time to look for a job, do resumes matter graphic

How do you feel about challenges? –Cas
I’d like to tell you that challenges are nothing more than opportunities. I’d like to tell you that challenges are chances for you to shine.  I’d like to tell you that challenges are meant to make you stronger.  But none of these things are true, challenges are something that “they” have put in front of you for “their” entertainment.  I have probably said too much as the New World Order reads everything, but I leave you with this:
Don’t you think he wish he had never been given this challenge, or at least gave his challenger a drink before they started?




Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Question Time #2

Question time!

I'm going to try this week's Q and A a little different.  So my unqualified answers will still come on Friday, but I thought I would ask for questions today.  That gives people 2 full days to ask a question that is very important to them.  And seeing that I am unqualified to answer any question that is asked you can rest assured that the answer you get will be the one that you need.  Remember there is a difference between want and need.... So feel free to fire away with question on love, medicine, science, nature (human and animal), the world, the universe, space, the ocean, literature,religion,  music, computers, programming, manufacturing, job performance, resume writing, character development, child raising, education, politics, crafting....These are just a small portion of the topics that I am unqualified to give answers on.  So please feel free to ask away in the comment section below.


Song of the day 

"My Hometown" - Neil Young..this comes from the Album A letter Home, recorded at Third Man Records and electro-mechanically engineered.  The Boss and Neil Young and Jack White, what is not to love?

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Vinyl Me, Please #1



Youth Lagoon The Year of Hibernation on  purple vinyl
This is my first offing from Vinyl Me, Please. I had not heard of Youth Lagoon or his album The Year of Hibernation prior to receiving it in the mail last week.  I have enjoyed it quite thoroughly.  Slow, melodic, ambient like a trip through a dream.  Not a bad one, but own where you don't quite know what is happening.

Jamie Lou was working last night and instead of watching TV, I played some music and put this on and she said "Am I going to like it?"
My reply was "Only you can know that."
As were were listening she said "That was not what I expected.  I actually didn't know what to expect, but it wasn't that.  That was really easy to work to."

So there you have it, from a workaholic music critic, if you want some super chill music to be able to enjoy yet still get some work done look for Trevor Powers as Youth Lagoon and his album The Year of Hibernation.

Which brings me to my next part, the player in the photo.  Broke down and got a new powered turntable, and went with the Audio Technica AT-LP120-USB.  Whilst I still have yet to utilized the USB to computer option with Audacity, I have enjoyed how easy it is to set up, balance, plug in and play with this unit.  While it may be more a low end DJ's table, the fact it has on board power and I do not have to mess with a pre-amp sold me on it.  This was picked up in large part thanks to a Christmas gift card to Amazon from Cas and Tad Chilly.  So thanks!

Now enjoy the melancholy that is:

Friday, January 16, 2015

Unqualified Advice: Q & A

Here is (maybe) my new Friday post: Unqualified Advice.  The name comes from where you would expect, I am not qualified to give answers or advice on any topic, but here we go:


What aspect of living in Texas as appealed to you the most? -Eric
Great Question Eric!  There are actual several aspects 1) eating 2) shelter 3) a place to live. Jamie Lou need a new job and after looking around Dallas is where she landed.  I like to joke that she had too many personal freedoms as a female in Iowa so Texas was the logical choice.  Since I am the eye candy in this relationship I follow where the money flows.  Now, if it is where we chose to live in Dallas... that is easier to answer, in keeping her commute to a a reasonable time and not wanting another fixer-upper the farther north you go the more house and land you get, hence we are almost in Plano in Far North Dallas just inside George Bush now.

Do Longhorns really have Long horns? -Jessica
These giant gentle creatures DO have long horns Jessica!  But the only long horn I prefer are horns down
Those Are LONG! now down


Is it wrong that when I go to a Thai place and they ask how spicy I want something 1-5, I always picture them using a Spice Weasel? -Mike
First of all, Always be confident in what you believe. Secondly, I am 87% sure the spice weasel is the official animal of Thailand. So it would only make sense that the wise and fierce animal would be used in this capacity.  But hear me when I say this:  NEVER TEASE A WEASEL!

If you could eat one food, and only one food, for the rest of your life what would it be? -Lee
Now this is a hard one.  The obvious answer is Pez, Cherry Flavor Pez.  But that has already been done.  So I would have to say I would choose lasagna.  Definitely lasagna.  Or enchiladas.  I would for sure choose enchiladas. Or cereal, I really like cereals, so I would for sure choose cereal.  I do like donuts. "Donuts" is my answer. No, steak. I would choose steak.  But then I do love sushi, so we end at Uni, uni would be what I choose.  So, there is my answer for the one food I would eat
Song of the day:
maybe the best metal song ever made "Sweating Bullets" Megadeth

Thursday, January 15, 2015

Things I like, trying something new.

THINGS I LIKE

So Zac and Dani and Ella and Charlie gave me my "man card" for Christmas.  Which brings me to the thing I like: Twin Peaks. Sure it has scenic views, sure the talent is better in Dallas than it is in
I finally got my man card back.
Des Moines, sure it may not be a place I would take small children.  But it has cold beer, and way above average food, that I have come to find out is made daily in house from scratch, which may explain why I like the food there.  But what I really like is they way I have been treated as a sports fan.  Being a viking and Cyclone fan in Cowboy and Longhorn territory respectively hasn't always been easy.  But at Twin Peaks they have no problem giving me a four top for my self and the game on my own television, not a lot of places would even care to cater to one person, but they have been more than willing.  I wouldn't say willing to bend over backwards, but I would like to see that.....

SOMETHING NEW

Unqualified advice

I am going to try this, leave a question any question and I will give you the answer.  But just know right now, I am pretty much unqualified to give any advice on any subject.  So it may end up being funny, or a giant failure.  So I guess Friday's unqualified advice responses will be up to you, the reader, to ask a question that you need the answer to.  And maybe a title for this part, "ask Cam" seems a bit obvious, and "unqualified advice" may be too simple, we shall see.  You are now on the clock blog reader!

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Hipster, Total Hipster pt. 3

A man walks down the street 
He says, "Why am I soft in the middle now? 
Why am I soft in the middle? 
 The rest of my life is so hard."

Cover Art for Paul Simon's Graceland

As I get older I see more than the funny video with Chevy Chase for "You Can Call Me Al" that was made.  I always found this song on the funny side and the video even funnier, but now I see it closer to a man getting older and wondering what happened to him and his life and having to travel to figure it out.


Inner sleeve, so many lyrics, so many
Another great Gift from Ted and Donna this year.  Paul Simon's Graceland on 180 gram vinyl.  Again complete with free digital download, which again is more handy that a portable record player.  I do not think that there is a bad song on this record.  I'd like to know your thoughts.  included with this record was a giant Graceland artwork poster on thick nice stock paper(photo all the way to the bottom), I will put some serious thought into getting it framed (I already have about 6 other items that need framed so what would be one more, it is only money right?).


I think that getting soft in the middle is something that most people can relate to.  It is a literal getting old and doughy "Mr Beerbelly Beerbelly" and maybe it is a spiritual softness from growing soft in convictions.  I do not have the answers I did not write the song.  Then again maybe it is just a funny little story with a super catch hook... Who wouldn't want a bodyguard named Betty that can call you Al?

Back cover artwork and Thanks
Track listing
Side one    
No.

1.     "The Boy in the Bubble"
2.     "Graceland"
3.     "I Know What I Know"
4.     "Gumboots"
5.     "Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes"
Side two    
No.
6.
    "You Can Call Me Al"
7.     "Under African Skies"
8.     "Homeless"
9.     "Crazy Love, Vol. II"
10. "That Was Your Mother"
11. "All Around the World or the Myth of Fingerprints"       Simon  
Additional tracks on the digital download
No.
12.
"Homeless" (demo version)
13. "Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes" (alternate version)
14. "All Around the World or the Myth of Fingerprints" (early version)

That inner sleeve speaks volumes to me.  So many words.  When I turn on the radio today there are seemingly only  2 lines of words repeated over and over and over and over.......  Now one tells a story, they just tell you It's Igggy Iz or something like that.  NOW GET OFF MY LAWN!

I am sure that there are better song writers and wordsmiths, but for my money Paul Simon is probably the best.  I will take his words over Dylan and McCartney any day.  But that is the beautiful thing about art and music, it is subjective and you don't always have to agree.  Please leave some of your favorites in the comment section below.  I am always on the look out for new stuff to try.

today's song of the day is a double live treat:
Paul Simon - "Graceland" and "You Can Call Me Al"

That is one big poster!