Things I learned from the movie The Hangover

yaaaaarrrrrr there be spoilers down below, so proceed with caution. Ye have been warned.


Mike, Jamie Lou and I went to the movie last week and we had a dashingly good time. We laughed, we cried, we came together closer as a group.

Actually, we just laughed.

So with all that here are some things I learned from watching The Hangover.

I learned that tigers like pepper, but hate cinnamon.

I learned that even though you may find Mike Tyson sweet, the guy that got punched by him might still find him a mean man.

I learned that they may have given out rings at the holocaust.

I learned that if you find a baby you should name him Carlos.

I learned that a wolf pack of four will wander the desert searching for strippers and cocaine.

I learned it is funny because he is fat.

I learned that next weekend is no good because the Jonas Brothers are in town.

I learned that counting cards, like masturbating on a plane, isn't illegal, just frowned upon.

I learned that since 9/11 that both counting cards and masturbating is probably illegal. Thanks Bin Laden!

I learned that some drug dealers don't know the difference between ecstasy and roofies.

I learned that better names for toofies inclue dropsies and floorsies.

I learned that if you friends call you Dr Faggot, your girlfriend will too.

I learned that Zach GalifianaKis shouldn't be within 200 feet of a school...or a Chuck-E-Cheese.

I learned that leaving a phone message is cool, but leaving a text is gay.

I learned that if you dare an insecure dentist to tear out his own tooth, he'll do it.

I also learned that will make him look like a nerdy hillbilly.

I learned that in fact, what ever happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Even if you destroy your future father-in-law's classic car.

And lastly, I learned that if you marry a hooker while blacked out from drugs and alcohol it is probably better that that woman at home. As she is a heartless woman that had sex with a bartender on a cruise ship.